The other day I was digging through a closet hunting for something I needed but could not find and I had to admit that things were getting out of hand. It was time for some organization. Now if I were asked, I would claim to keep a fairly tidy home. At first glance this would certainly seem to be an accurate assessment. Well…. It would seem to be accurate until you opened a closet door.
At that point, all bets are off and you are taking your life into your hands. There is no guaranteeing what might tumble out and bop you on the head. It could be a box of old cords and electrical plugs that no longer plug into any appliance we currently own. It could be the overflowing box of half-finished crafts that would make Martha Stewart shake her head in disapproval. It might be the bag of clothes that I have not been able to fit into since the last presidential election but that I simply have not been able to bring myself to let go and admit that these items are never going to be worn by me again. (I mean,a girl can dream, right?) It could be one of the myriad of knickknacks and tchotchkes that have fallen out of favor and been relegated to the dark recesses of the aforementioned closet. It could be just about anything. As you can see I am an indiscriminate “closet-stasher”. So, the home that seems so neat and tidy at first glance is in reality a disaster waiting to happen. Life would be so much easier if I just took the time to sort out what is useful and what isn’t before simply stuffing things in closets to be dealt with later.
I couldn’t help but reflect how this pattern was evident in other areas of my life also. Stashing away unwanted emotions and feelings was easier than dealing with them. My initial reactions to messy, unwanted emotions is to stash them. This works until the door is opened and who knows what ugliness is going to tumble out? I have always tried to appear as if I have my act together when in reality most days I am a hot mess. Please tell me I am not alone here. I am always second-guessing what I should have said and done in any given circumstance.
There are relationships that have gotten awkward because of untimely spoken words or misunderstandings. Things that hurt too much at the moment to deal with so they were simply put on the shelf and ignored. There are old beliefs and mindsets that have been outgrown but never discarded. There are things I once treasured that now lie discarded in the recesses of my mind, taking up room I really don’t have to spare.
It is time to do some “housecleaning“. Holy Spirit please come and clean out all that is not of God in my life. Get rid of the clutter that distracts and hinders me from moving forward in You. Bring order to the chaos and sweep out the cobwebs lurking within. I cry out as David did, “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right, persevering and steadfast spirit within me.” Psalm 51:10
While my heavenly Father deals with my messy heart, I am going to do what I can to sort out the mess in that den closet.
-Cindi Beauman
Compelled Church Women's Ministry 